The Monster

Violence these days has become a tweet gone viral, with 140 characters of hatred and a hashtag of lunacy.

War is not the new shirt you’ve been saving that one morning you just wake up and go “I should wear this today”. And nations are not siblings, no. If you hide each other’s toys and then go on taking revenge on each others’ most loved possessions, don’t think mom’s going to help you when you end up pulling each others’ hair and breaking nail for nail. Dad’s not going o come home with presents and put you on his shoulders. No one is going to clean up the mess when you turn the house upside down and leave it all destroyed.

How easy it is to post “Modi is a coward afraid of war with Pakistan” and how painful it is to take bullets on your chest and bury your dead.

For every other headline saying “Delhi on red alert against attacks” there’s a normal citizen like me terrified of doing my normal things. The thought of a family member being blown away makes every inch of my skin tremble with fear.

If you call blood thirst courageous, I’d better find solace in cowardice. Of all the history I’ve mugged up in school, I don’t remember any war that has done us some good. But I do remember civilizations being wiped away and nations ripped off their social, economical and political stability due to war.

True that we need a solution.

True that we cannot and should not tolerate terrorism.

But I am sure war is not any obvious answer. 

Courage

some days make me feel like there is a conspiracy against me in the world

everything topples down one by one

just when I think it better ended  something disastrous unfolds

“courage”

I take in a deep sigh and whisper to myself, have courage young girl.

there are going to be days even worse in life

there are going to be days you'll have to choose between burning paths

and walk ahead without any loved one by your side

sometimes the fire will engulf your most precious people

and sometimes those people will themselves choose the other path.

some people will enter uninvited into your life and become a part of it

they will question your beliefs, your past, your insecurities

they'll think they can rescue you, take you out of this labyrinth

out beyond to the field Rumi wrote about

and indeed they will

they will hold your hand and guide you out of the blazing fire

but just when you're about to step inside the gate of bliss they'll vanish

vanish like a puff of smoke out of the fire they just extinguished

and there you'll be standing

one step forward from here will make you the girl you always dreamed to be,

the girl your mom will be proud of and the world will cherish

but the sad part is, you won't be able to move from here

your palm is still wet with the imprints of their fingers that were just held between yours

your mind still shelters their image and their promises

these thoughts running in your mind will again paralyze your strength

now your feet are heavier than a sack of milestones

you should have stopped

you'll curse yourself

though you knew all this while that you'll never have the courage to go alone from here

why did you hold their hand in the first place

you should have crossed the fire alone

but you wanted friendship and companionship

you wanted love

well girl, there's always a prize you have to pay for love

it's the most romanticized and longed emotion in the world so what made you think you'll get it so easily

now stand here

stand here and watch others go

learn from them

there's no fire here but you'll still burn with envy and lust

meanwhile, be brave